I wonder sometimes if manufacturers of foolproof items keep a fool or two on their payroll to test things.
– Alan Coren
Television is more interesting than people. If it were not we should have people standing in the corner of our room.
– Alan Coren
The Act of God designation on all insurance policies; which means, roughly, that you cannot be insured for the accidents that are most likely to happen to you.
– Alan Coren
Democracy consists of choosing your dictators, after they've told you what it is you want to hear.