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Quotes by Laurence J. Peter


The great question is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with failure.
– Laurence J. Peter
A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.
– Laurence J. Peter
A man convinced against his will is not convinced.
– Laurence J. Peter
A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.
– Laurence J. Peter
A pessimist is a man who looks both ways when he crosses the street.
– Laurence J. Peter
America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.
– Laurence J. Peter
As a matter of fact is an expression that precedes many an expression that isn't.
– Laurence J. Peter
Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees have to be appointed to do the work.
– Laurence J. Peter
Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.
– Laurence J. Peter
Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.
– Laurence J. Peter
Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell, and advertise.
– Laurence J. Peter
Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away.
– Laurence J. Peter
Everyone is in awe of the lion tamer in a cage with half a dozen lions-everyone but a school bus driver.
– Laurence J. Peter
Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.
– Laurence J. Peter
Going to church doesn't make you any more a Christian than going to the garage makes you a car.
– Laurence J. Peter
Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
– Laurence J. Peter
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
– Laurence J. Peter
It's better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week.
– Laurence J. Peter
Lead, follow, or get out of the way.
– Laurence J. Peter
Men now monopolize the upper levels... depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence.
– Laurence J. Peter
Nobody can be perfect unless he admits his faults, but if he has faults how can he be perfect?
– Laurence J. Peter
Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object.
– Laurence J. Peter
The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.
– Laurence J. Peter
The seaman tells stories of winds, the ploughman of bulls; the soldier details his wounds, the shepherd his sheep.
– Laurence J. Peter
There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it, and the rest of us.
– Laurence J. Peter
There are two kinds of failures: those who thought and never did, andthose who did and never thought.
– Laurence J. Peter
When in doubt or danger, run in circles, scream and shout.
– Laurence J. Peter
Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence.
– Laurence J. Peter
You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.
– Laurence J. Peter
You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water. Don't let yourself indulge in vain wishes.
– Laurence J. Peter
An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it.
– Laurence J. Peter
Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame.
– Laurence J. Peter
Every man serves a useful purpose: A miser, for example, makes a wonderful ancestor.
– Laurence J. Peter
If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.
– Laurence J. Peter
In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular.
– Laurence J. Peter
Real, constructive mental power lies in the creative thought that shapes your destiny, and your hour-by-hour mental conduct produces power for change in your life. Develop a train of thought on which to ride. The nobility of your life as well as your happiness depends upon the direction in which that train of thought is going.
– Laurence J. Peter
Speak when you are angry--and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
– Laurence J. Peter
The incompetent with nothing to do can still make a mess of it.
– Laurence J. Peter
Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to believe.
– Laurence J. Peter
Slump, and the world slumps with you. Push, and you push alone.
– Laurence J. Peter
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.
– Laurence J. Peter
Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.
– Laurence J. Peter
Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
– Laurence J. Peter
An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
– Laurence J. Peter